Unconditional

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Title: Unconditional
Author: Helen
Summary: After season 6 climax, Willow gives all her magic to Xander
Rating: PG
Spoilers: if you've seen Grave, then none

The ground was crying.

Willow was crying, laying flat on the floor her body shuddering as fresh tears streamed down her face. The ground grieved, it was an overpowering sadness, the likes of which she had never felt before.

Willow felt strong arms wrapping themselves around her body, and she realised Xander was still at her side. The magic which had consumed her still crackled around her body, making her feel like a ball of electricity, though Xander didn’t budge, he didn’t even seem to notice as another spark leapt from willow, burning his arm. He just held on tighter, pulling her up to a sitting position.

“I’m not leaving your side Will, I love you.” He whispered into her hair, which had turned from the deep black back to the October red that she had once hated so much.

The tears ebbed away, as willow began to hold on to Xander, returning his hug.

“I loved her so much” Willow huskily said, the tears cracking her voice. She felt a lump in her throat and she could barely breathe, she didn’t want to, but the breath came and filled her lungs with oxygen, she breathed out again.

“We know how much you loved her, and we are all going to be here to help you get through this time.” Xander moved out from the embrace to look willow in the face.

“Can you stand?”

“I don’t want to move, I don’t want to go anywhere, I just want Tera back.” Willow laid back on the floor, feeling the grief of the earth she laid on. “The ground is crying.” She said, beginning to understand why, “I made the earth cry.”

Xander put his hand on hers. “it’s ok Will, you just go ahead and talk.”

“I want her back. I tried, with all the magics I had. They wouldn’t give her back to me. We managed to bring Buffy back, I couldn’t get Tera. I’ve failed her.”

“You didn’t fail her Will, you know how bringing Buffy back has effected her. Maybe Tera’s where Buffy went. Safe and happy. Maybe she would hate to be brought back. Buffy was strong, she had to dig her way out of her own grave. Can you imagine putting Tera through all that?”

A fresh stream of tears made their way down Willows face, tracing the tears that had run before.

“I miss her.” She whispered. “They stole her from me and they wont give her back.”

“We all miss her Will. You are not alone.”

“ But I’ve done such terrible things. I made the ground cry. I’ve killed. Oh god, I tried to kill Buffy and Giles, did they get away from me? Are they safe?”

“Well last time I looked Buffy and Dawn were trapped down a hole, and I have no idea about Giles, but if he’s with Anya he’ll be fine. She takes good care of injured people, despite her history of injuring. Don’t worry about them Will, they’ll be fine and they love you.”

“They love me?” Will cried, “I tried to kill them. I tried to end the world. I’ve done so much damage.” Xander hugged her

“They love you Will, where would the Scooby gang be without their master researcher?” Willow hugged Xander back.

“I’m dangerous, you need to stay away from me, I could hurt you.” Willow pushed Xander away.

“I’m not going anywhere.” Xander pulled her back, she was too weak to resist.

“Ok, then do something for me.” She cried

“Anything Will.”

Willow pushed her hand against Xander and with the last of her strength and all of the energy she could muster she pushed all of the magic inside her through her hand and into Xander.

The power of the magic encapsulated Xander and raised him off the ground sending him flying. He landed 50 metres away from Willow who had collapsed on the ground.

“Willow, what have you done?” Xander whispered as he fainted.

********************

‘Xander, please wake up, please you have to.’ It was Buffys voice, he heard but it wasn’t at he same time. She sounded scared, and that was just not Buffy.

“He’s going to be ok isn’t he? He’ll wake up and be fine, wont he?” Dawns voice rang in his ears, it was a different sensation to Buffys voice, which had seemed to vibrate in his head.

‘I don’t know’ The scared voice was back vibrating round his head.

“He will be fine Dawnie.” This voice was stronger, more confident and recognisably Buffy.

What was going on. He groaned, feeling the oxygen release from his lungs and flow up his windpipe releasing noise from his vocal chords. An explosion of pain in his head, so much pain.

He could feel his arms, his legs. He was sure he was laying down but he could feel no weight on his back. He opened his eyes and saw the pale blue sky and two pairs of eyes staring down at him. Memories flooded back to him.

“Will?...” He asked

“She’ll be ok.” Buffy told him,

Xander tried to sit up but felt no support beneath him

“What’s going on?” he asked

‘you’re floating’ the voice in his head had changed, it was worried, but it sounded like Dawn

“I’m floating?” Xander asked, coming round a bit faster, “What do you mean?”

Buffy and Dawn exchanged glances.

“how do I get down?” Xander asked nervously. The pain in his head was receding.

“How did you get up?” Buffy asked. Putting her hand on Xanders stomach and using her weight to lower him. A spark leapt from Xander giving Buffy an electric shock

“OW!” She cried. “What’s going on?”

“I gave him my magic” Willow said, “It was the safest thing to do.”

Dawn turned her back on Willow, moving the other side of Xander. Buffy faced her. Neither girl was totally sure what they should be feeling.

“How do we get him down?” Buffy asked.

“He gets himself down.” She turned to look at Xander. “We need to get you to Giles.”

“if he’s still alive,” Dawn spat out.

“How does he get down Willow?” Buffy repeated her question.

“Xander, I need you to think about the ground. Close your eyes and concentrate hard. Imagine how the ground feels beneath you, down to the prickle of grass.”

Xander closed his eyes. He felt himself begin to lower.

‘that’s the way.’ The voice in his head was now Willows

He felt the ground beneath him, finally he was down. As soon as he touched the floor he felt the wave of grief wash over him, overwhelming him with anguish. He understood what Willow had meant by saying the ground was crying.

“Oh god,” he breathed, “the pain, I cant take the sadness,” he cried.

“We’re right here Xander, can you stand?” Buffy asked.

“What have you done to him Willow?” Dawn turned round to look at Willow. “Look at what you’ve done to him!”

“That’s enough Dawn, you heard Willow before, we need to get him to Giles, and we need to do it fast.”

As Xander slowly rose to his feet, he felt his head buzz with different noises and voices, he wasn’t alone in his mind- he felt so many people in there with him, and it hurt.

He felt a surge, something was in his veins and moving upward from his feet, as his face went red Buffy turned to willow,

“Whats happening to him?” She asked

“He can’t handle the magic. He isn’t used to the power. It will destroy him if we don’t get to Giles fast.” Willow said, “We’ve got to get going.”

As Willow said this, Xander was aware that the surge had moved upwards and felt the electricity inside his stomach. The power stormed upwards and ran along his arms. His finger tips buzzed and as a reaction he flexed out his fingers. Purple light streamed from his fingers and towards a tree in his path, the leaves caught fire, and it didn’t take long before the tree exploded.

“time to get going.” Buffy said. Xander wasn’t moving, he was clutching his head, sweat pouring off him.

“It’s too much, theres too much in here” he murmered.

“whats he talking about?” Dawn asked

“Xander, can you hear me?” Buffy asked, “Xander, stay with me, I’m here.” Xander looked around at Buffy, aware that the voice was coming from outside his head.

“Xander we need to get going.” She repeated herself.

The walk back to Buffys was long and tiring, Buffy was covered in scorch marks and burns from where Xander had fallen and she had reached out to break his fall. Every surge in magic resulted in explosions, with all his energy, Xander attempted to direct it away from his friends.

They walked in silence, stopping every now and then to help Xander, Buffy caught herself wishing Spike was there to help them. As she wished this, Xander sent a stream of purple light towards a building, fire erupted, but the structure remained intact.

The magic had wiped out Xanders energy and he fell once more to the floor, picking him back up, Buffy felt another spark burn her arm, then again, she thought, Spike would probably be dusted by these damn sparks.

Xanders head was screaming, screaming with peoples thoughts and dreams, screaming with the pain and grief buried with in willow, and screaming with the misery of the ground, but he heard Buffys thought loud and clear. She was thinking about Spike. He hadn’t realised how close they’d grown, how much she had relied, and even cared for him.

Willow looked at Xander, What had she done to him? When she poured her magic into him, she had realised it was dangerous, but she really hadn’t thought about the consequences. His body was deteriorating, he couldn’t cope with the power for much longer, before it exploded from him, killing him in the process. He already looked severely drained, he couldn’t walk more than a couple of meters at a time, at this rate he would die before they got to Giles.

Dawn walked behind Buffy, who had started to practically carry Xander, all his weight was on her shoulders, the magic was burning away at Buffys skin, but she didn’t seem to notice, her only concern was getting Xander safely to Giles. Dawn thought about what Buffy had said to her down the hole, how it was the start of a new era of responsibility, and if that meant that she would get burnt in the process, then so be it.

Buffy heaved Xanders body another few metres before noticing it had gotten slightly lighter. She began to worry that Xander had passed out again,

“Xander, are you still with us?” She cried, he responded by groaning. Buffy looked around and saw that Dawn had his other arm round her shoulder, and was carrying some of his weight. Buffy smiled at her sister, She had meant what she said about wanting to show Dawn the world rather than protect her from it.

Willow watched the sisters struggle with Xanders weight. This was all her fault, if she was a stronger person this would never have happened.

Willows thoughts echoed in Xanders mind, etching itself into his brain. Willow blamed herself and she could not be allowed to go on feeling so bad, she needed reassurance and love. She was getting nothing from the slayer and her sister.

“Will…?” He breathed

“I’m here honey, right behind you.” Will touched his back carefully, but not avoiding the sharp burn she received in the process.

“I love you.” Xander struggled against the two girls, recognising the familiar surge, “watch out” he warned. Another stream of purple light blasted from his fingertips, missing the girls and hitting a shop, once again fires burst from the building.

The group continued to struggle with Xanders weight, this time helped by willow. They had managed to get him to Buffys house without further incident.

As they set him down on the sofa, Dawn ran round the house to see if Anya had returned with Giles, returning to the living room with no luck.

“I think it’s best if willow stays here and looks after Xander. Dawn check Xanders flat, they may have gone there, I’ll check the magic shop.” Dawn looked down at Xander, he looked bad, she really didn’t have time to argue against Buffy, she just hoped Buffy knew what she was doing.

The girls hurried from the house, running as fast as they could to their destinations, praying that they would find Giles and that he would be able- bodied enough to make it to Xander in time.

**********************

Buffy reached the remains of what used to be the magic shop, she pushed the door open and it fell off its hinges and on to the floor, she walked through listening for the slightest sign that someone may still be alive in here.

Every broken piece that buffy walked over was a reminder of the massive fight between herself and willow, willow had been so strong, so unbelievably powerful, and now xander had that power inside him, and it was killing him.

“hello?” Buffy called, “Anya? Giles?” there was no reply. This was the last place Buffy had seen them, she had left Giles to fight Willow, had he died? Willow had thought not. And she would be the one who would know best.

As buffy walked through the rubble that had been the magic box, she realised that she was wasting time, they were not there.

She picked up her phone and dialled Xanders number, hoping that Anya would be there to pick up the phone.

***********************

Dawn ran, her legs were aching and she wanted to fall down, but she continued to run. She was so close to Xanders flat, there was no way she’d stop now.

Finally she reached the door to the flat, she knocked and tried the door, it opened.

“Anya?” are you here, Dawn walked through to the bedroom, She saw Giles flat out on the bed, Anya was by his side.

“Is he ok?” Dawn whispered to Anya.

“He’s sleeping, and he’s in pain. Willow wasn’t very kind on him. I took care of him!” Anya looked so proud, she’d finally done something for someone else without any thought of what was in it for her. That would show Xander who was selfish!!!

“We need to get him to Buffys, now.” Dawn cried, “Willow did something to Xander and he’s dying!”

The words shook Anya to the core, Xander was dying? She couldn’t let that happen. The phone began ringing.

Dawn answered it knowing instinctively that the voice on the other end would be Buffys

“They’re here. Giles is in pain. Anya’s waking him.” Dawn listened to the voice Anya couldn’t hear. Xander needed Giles, and if she had to break a few vengeance demon rules to help her love, then so be it.

Anya went over to Giles and shook him awake, “Giles? Wake up- you’re needed.”

Giles groaned and rolled over. Anya was aware of Dawn putting the phone down and returning to the room. They didn’t have time for this.

Anya put her hand on Giles, “Run home, we’ll meet you there.” Anya told Dawn. Dawn was confused until she realised what Anya was about to do. As Anya and Giles disappeared from the room, Dawn span on her heels and began to run back home.

*****************************

Willow held Xanders hand, ‘hold on there Xander, sweetie, I can’t do this without you.’ Willow knew that Xander would be able to hear her thoughts, even if she could no longer hear his. ‘they’re on their way, they’re all coming to help you.’

Xander felt weak, he didn’t know how long he could hold on. He was so tired. They were coming to help him, he heard Willows voice loud and clear. She needed him to be alright and he couldn’t leave her. Xander couldn’t fight any longer, he felt the strength leave him and he fell unconscious.

Willow watched Xander close his eyes, she felt so helpless. He was going to die, and it was her fault, how could any of them ever think of forgiving her for this?

Suddenly willow was aware that she was no longer alone in the living room, she looked round and saw Anya and Giles slowly appear on the floor. Anya was kneeling next to Giles, and Giles was obviously not in his best shape.

Anya looked at Xander on the sofa, she had never seen him look so bad, He was all pale and sweaty, his eyes were closed and he was unconscious.

“What have you done to him?” Anya snarled at Willow, “He tells you he loves you and you nearly kill him?”

Willow went to Giles side, trying not to hear what Anya was saying,

“Giles, wake up. It’s Willow. Xander needs your help.” Giles’ eyelids fluttered as he woke up.

“Willow?” He asked. He was still shaken from their last encounter but knew that Xander had saved her, and it seemed now that Xander needed the debt repaying, he had saved the world, and now he needed to be saved.

The door opened and Buffy ran in the house, surprised and curious as to how Anya and Giles had got back before her.

“Giles?” Buffy ran to his side, “Giles, it’s Buffy, Are you ok. Can you help Xander.”

Giles sat up, pain erupted down his spine and he grimaced. He had to fight through this.

“What happened to Xander?” He asked

“I gave him my Magic.” Willow hung her head expecting Giles to lay into her, instead he smiled, “Oh, willow, that’s marvellous.” He told her, “But we have to get it out of him.”

“it’s killing him, whats marvellous about that?” Anya demanded.

“It’s simple to reverse.” Giles started,

“I don’t want it back, I cant control it,” Willow began to panic.

“I don’t expect you to have it back,” Giles told her, “I’ll take it.” Giles walked over to Xander. He looked down at the unconscious body and realised that he didn’t have long until the magic would overcome Xander completely. He put his hand on Xanders chest.

Buffy watched Giles move over to where Xander lay and in a very gentle manner, he put his hand on Xander chest. Buffy saw Giles lips move and his eyes opened wide as his voice grew louder, but the words he was saying were incomprehensible.

************************

Dawn had finally got back to her house, as she walked through the door she had to protect her eyes from the blinding light, the light was so colourful, purple, reds and

yellows filled the room.

Dawn could barely make out the shadows that were Buffy, Willow and Anya. She could just see Giles leaning over Xander, both bodies bathed in a whiter light. She noticed the the light was moving round Giles, and it began to move towards him, moving inside him.

The bright lights disappeared and Giles stood up and stretched, as he took in all the magics he realised he wasn’t quite prepared for the strength of the power. It was much more than he had expected, but he knew he could take it in. He was powerful and he could accommodate this energy.

Giles stood up, using the newly acquired power to heal his wounds and to heal Xander.

He turned to Buffy, “Xander will be fine now. He needs rest, he has been through a lot today. You may find that he will retain some of the magic that he was endowed with, but it will fade and it will not effect him any more.”

Willow looked around the room, she knew she wasn’t welcome here, she should leave.

“I understand what you’ve been feeling.” Giles said as he watched Willow walk towards the door. She stopped and looked back at him.

“I’ve killed and hurt the people I care about the most. I was evil.”

“you were grieving. Magic twists everything. You were doing what you thought you needed to. I think everybody in this room will need time to get over everything that has happened.” Giles walked towards her and put his arm round her shoulder like he was a proud father.

“what happens now?” Willow asked.

“The magic which is inside me isn’t mine, not all of it. The magic you borrowed from me will stay within me, but the magic which is yours needs to be returned to it’s owner.”

“No Giles, I can’t take it back, I wouldn’t know what to do. It’s too powerful for me!” tears formed in willows eyes.

“I understand that Willow,” Giles said softly, “That’s why I want you to return with me to England. I want you to learn from the coven there and stay there until you have learned all you need to learn.”

“England?” Willow asked. She was excited about training within a coven, especially one so old and experienced, but she didn’t want to leave Xanders side. “When?”

Giles circled his arm opening a vortex. Through it Buffy, Dawn, Anya and Willow could see a green meadow.

“How about now?” Giles asked

Willow looked around at the others, the hurt she had caused was still apparent on their faces, and at that moment she wanted to go away and never come back, if she went, how could she ever face these people again? How could she ever call them her friends?

She looked through the vortex at the welcoming meadow. This was a good opportunity.

“Let’s go.” She told him, “Look after Xander for me,” she asked the room, “He really is one in a million.”

Giles let Willow go through first and told Buffy that they’d be in contact.

“Will she ever come back?” Buffy asked. Giles looked at her.

“When she’s ready.” He told her, “She’ll be back. And she’ll need you to help her. Can you do that?”

“I don’t know.” Buffy admitted, she looked down at the sleeping Xander, “Maybe.”

**************************

the end