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When Giles was comfortably settled in the driver’s seat, Spike finally turned to face him.
“I want to know what’s going on. I want to know what you know about me. I want to know how I fit in here. I want to know who I am.”
Giles sighed. “It’s complicated.”
“Clearly,” Spike snapped and then shook his head wearily. “Sorry. But this is hard for me. I need you to stop keeping things from me. This is my life we’re talking about.”
“You won’t like it.”
“I don’t like this. How much worse can it be?”
The Watcher grimaced. “Worse.”
“Well you lot seem to care about me so I can’t be some sort of evil serial killer…”
Giles didn’t say anything. He simply stared at Spike with a strange look on his face.
A cold chill ran down the blonde’s spine and he shrank back in his seat. “Tell me the truth. Now.”
****
Wesley sipped his coffee as he watched Faith pace back and forth across the living room floor.
“I should have gone with her,” the brunette was saying, clearly agitated. “Shouldn’t I? You’re thinking she needed me with her aren’t you?”
“I…”
“She said she was fine. She looked fine. Do you think she was faking?”
“I…”
“I hate being like this. It was so much easier when I wanted to kill her.”
Wesley choked on his coffee. ”Faith calm down.”
“Easy for you to say. You’re on Angel’s side.”
Catching her wrist as she passed, Wesley pulled his girlfriend down next to him on the couch. “I’m not on anyone’s side. I only care about you. Now stop worrying about Buffy. She’ll be fine.”
“No. She won’t”
Wesley didn’t say anything. He wrapped his arms around Faith and hugged her to him.
“I love you,” she murmured against his chest. Her former Watcher smiled and ran a comforting hand over her hair.
“I love you too.”
A sudden banging on the door shattered their peaceful moment. The couple were instantly on alert.
“Faith! Are you there? Buffy’s not at home. Faith? What’s going on:?”
The Slayer opened the door to a trembling Dawn and an annoyed Connor. She waved them inside and led Dawn towards the sofa. Connor nodded briefly towards Wesley and then moved to stare out of the window, effectively ignoring the others.
“Andrew said Spike’s alive,” Dawn muttered in to the silence.
“Yeah,” Faith said simply, sharing a look with her lover.
“Have you seen him?”
“Yeah,” the Slayer repeated and waited nervously for the younger girl’s reaction.
Dawn remained still and silent as the words sank in. Her life seemed to be rewinding rapidly in her head, taking her back to the last time she had seen her friend.
****
Sunnydale – December 2001
“Spike?”
“Nibblet.”
“Buffy’s not here.”
“Good. Can I come in?”
The teenager stepped back immediately, realising that they were still standing in the doorway.
“Why did you knock?” she asked, following him into the living room. “You usually just stroll right in.”
“I wanted to be sure the Slayer wasn’t here,” Spike told her fidgeting nervously.
Dawn’s eyebrows quirked in surprise. “Why?”
Spike sat down on the couch and patted the space next to him. With a smile Dawn curled up beside him.
“We need to talk.”
The young girl frowned a little but forced a grin. “Are you breaking up with me?”
“Don’t. This isn’t easy for me.”
“Spike. You’re scaring me.”
“I’m going away.”
“When are you c…?” Dawn began automatically, but stopped herself. “You’re not coming back. Are you?”
The vampires shook his head. “I don’t think so sweetheart.”
“Did Buffy do this?”
“No.”
“Liar.”
Spike took hold of Dawn’s hands and squeezed them comfortingly. “Don’t blame your sister. It’s my fault.”
“Stop defending her.”
“Dawn…”
“Don’t leave me.”
“I can’t stay.”
“Spike…”
“It’s for your own good. Trust me. You’ll be better off without me around.”
“No. Let me come with you.”
“’Bit…”
“I can’t stay here without you.”
“Dawn!” Spike exploded harshly. “Enough. I just came to say goodbye.”
The young girl wrenched her hands away from her friend’s and scrambled to her feet. “Go to hell.”
“Dawn!” Spike shouted, failing to stop her as she raced to her room and slammed the door.”
****
Sunnydale – July 2007
Giles glanced at his passenger and winced. The _expression in Spike’s face clearly said that if the car hadn’t been in motion, he’d be running as fast as he could in the opposite direction. The Watcher had seriously considered pulling over and letting the other man get on with it, but the thought of what it would do to Buffy is Spike left again kept him driving.
“I know it isn’t exactly what you wanted to hear,” Giles began when the silence became too much. “The very idea that vampires are real is difficult for everyone to come to terms with. Buffy herself didn’t take to the idea right away. Or so I’m told. I can imagine how you’re feeling.”
Spike’s eyes were screaming “Stop talking, crazy person,” but the Watcher forged ahead regardless.
“It could be worse. I remember once we were…”
“Oh will you please stop talking. Now.”
They drove in silence for a while, both lost in their own thoughts.
“I don’t understand,” Spike said at length. “If I’m – was – a vampire, and Buffy is a…”
“The.”
“The – sorry – the Slayer, why is she friends with me?”
Giles thought that that was a wonderful question, but refrained from voicing his opinion of Buffy and Spike’s relationship. “You’ll have to ask her.”