Know Your Place

Fanfiction
-My Fics
-Collaborations
-Other Buffy/Spike Fics
-Series
-Challenges
-Non Buffy/Spike Fics
History
Links
Link to Me
Updates
Awards Won


Back to Main

E-mail Hilary

=========================================================
He eyes the Slayer sitting on the back steps, looking out over her
protectorate. He doesn't want to disturb her. There are plenty of
other places to catch a smoke.

"You just gonna hover behind me, or do you wanna sit?"

Her voice startles him as it always does when she addresses him
these days. The edge is soft and caresses him, rather than slicing
through his thin skin with abandon.

He moves silently, drifting towards her warmth like the proverbial
moth. Doesn't speak as he lights up and takes a drag, sitting beside
her. She gives him a sidelong glance, full of disapproval. He
returns it full of end-of-days resignation. She looks down and then
away with a mirthless laugh.

"We'll make it, luv." He says, sotto voce.

"Not all."

"No." He exhales. "Not all…but most."

"Most." She echoes, sighing. "Most isn't enough."

"I'll do what I can. Do my best."

She turns to him fully in the moonlight. His skin is luminescent;
his hair is on fire, gathering light to it like a ravenous and
greedy thing.

"I know." She smiles a small smile. He doesn't look at her. The
smudge on the step below him holds his interest. Dried blood.

"It won't be enough." The crinkle in his brow fascinates her. Her
hand moves of its own volition, following a predestined path to his
forehead; to the source of his consternation. As if on cue, his head
turns into it.

She touches him lightly. The electricity burns him. He has to close
his eyes. Her index finger smoothes out his furrowed brow and his
face relaxes. She traces the line of his nose, the outline of his
lips; his chin and drops her hand to her lap.

"I know you'll do all you can and that's more than enough, Spike."
Her voice is so soft, so revealing that he shivers. Lifting his eyes
to hers, he feels himself becoming submerged.

This is a place of terror for him. He doesn't want to go back there
alone again.

"Buffy-"

"Uh-uh. Don't." She turns from him, resuming her vigil. They sit in
silence for a hundred years before he looks back out into the
darkness.

When her hand comes to rest in his, he slowly curls his fingers
around it watching, with interest, the contrast of porcelain and
gold. She takes a deep and soundless breath.

"I love you."

His eyes fly to her face and there isn't even the subtlest of
changes. He briefly wonders if it was an auditory hallucination, but
then she swivels her gaze and determined green meets astonished
blue. She squeezes his hand as if to say `this is real.' He looks
down at it and then again over to her. Her other hand reaches up to
wipe away the tear he didn't know he'd shed.

"If I don't make it-"

"You will." His strained voice comes to him after a few false starts.

"If one of us…or both of us…" She looks down for a moment, consumed
by the possibility, before meeting his angry and incredulous
eyes. "I want – I need for you to know."

"Buffy-"

"Do you love me?" The flavor of whatever he is about to say is wiped
from his tongue. He can only taste her fear.

"Always."

"Say it." Her eyes are wet-rimmed saucers. "Please, I need-"

"I love you, Buffy. Now. Forever...Always." He brings her hand to
his mouth and gently kisses it, his eyes closing. She watches him,
an odd feeling of relief settles over her.

When their eyes meet again, they both smile with the absurdity of it
all. He removes his fingers from hers and runs his hand tentatively
over her hair and down her back. She leans into him as he scoots
closer. They sit side-by-side, both lost in thought, knowing it's
the beginning of the end.

"It makes sense. Us. Doing this here." Her tone is wistful.

"Why's that, luv?"

"This is kinda our place."

"This is? Out here in the thick of night an' all?"

"No, I mean here. On these steps. With these trees." He looks
around, remembering the first time they sat there together and every
time after.

"I suppose." He kisses her hair, leaning his cheek on the top of her
head. He flicks the forgotten cigarette onto the dirt and folds her
in his arms. They sit quietly, waiting for eternity.

=fin=